If you are fed up with failed attempts to quit alcohol, you may be starting to lose hope. You may also be wondering how other people seem to manage in achieving long-term recovery, yet you are still struggling to stop for good. Would it not be great if you could find out the secret to these people’s success? Read on to find out what these individuals may be doing differently to you that accounts for their ability to succeed in recovery.
First Things First – People in Long-Term Recovery Are Not Better Than You
The fact that other people are succeeding where you are struggling does not mean that they are better than you are. The more likely reason for this difference is that these individuals are doing things that you are not doing. What you need to do is find out what it is that accounts for their success and begin to adopt these strategies in your own life. Below are some of the most important secrets to breaking away from alcoholism.
Burn all Your Boats
If you have ever heard of the motivational speaker Tony Robbins? He advises people who want to achieve anything to burn their boats. He uses a story of a person who decides they want to make a life on a tropical island. If this person arrives there by boat and then keeps this vessel anchored offshore, they are always going to be tempted to return to the boat and leave when things get hard. A much better option would be to burn this boat so that this individual has to make their life on the tropical island work.
This same logic applies to breaking away from addiction. If you enter a rehab program with the idea that you can return to alcohol or drugs when things get hard, you are setting yourself up for failure. You need to burn your boats. Take the option of relapse off the table and fully commit to this new life. A good attitude to have would be ‘I’m going to do whatever it takes to make recovery work’.
Stop Making Excuses for Failing to Achieve Long-Term Recovery
There are going to be reasons why you are not achieving long-term recovery, but it does not benefit you to focus too much on why something is not working. Your goal is to find out what works. The problem with paying too much attention to the excuses is it just disempowers you. There are always going to be far more excuses for not doing something than there are ways to do it, yet people still get things done. If you are always making excuses for your failure to achieve long-term sobriety, you are never going to develop the motivation to achieve it.
Choose Your Role Models Carefully
Humans are highly influenced by the people they spend time with and look up to. This is why in groups like Alcoholics Anonymous they always advise new members to stick with the winners. This is great advice and it does not only apply to members of the 12-Step programs. If you spend more time around those who are doing well in recovery, some of their magic is going to rub off on you. You need these people to be your role models because they already have what you want. If you spend most of your time around people who are using alcohol or drugs then this is the kind of person you are going to be.
Understand that Your Self-Esteem Has Been Reduced by Addiction
If you feel that you do not really deserve to escape addiction, you need to understand that this idea is arising because you have low self-esteem. Drug or alcohol abuse has giving you a real beating and this means your self-confidence has been drastically reduced. Even if you are able to put on an outward show of being confident, the chances are that this is just a mask to hide your low self-esteem. The good news is that once you begin to rebuild your life, your self-esteem is going to increase in leap and bounds. The important thing is you do not listen to this voice in your head that says you don’t deserve to succeed.
Have Faith in Your New Life
One of the most important secrets to being successful in recovery is the willingness to take a leap of faith. You are taking a step into the unknown, but you have to believe that this is going to lead to a better future for you. The way to do this is to understand that by doing the right things, you are going to start getting the right results. You already know the opposite is true; by falling into addiction you have been doing the wrong things, and look where that got you.
Never Take Your Recovery for Granted
It doesn’t matter if you have been sober for four days or 40 years, you should never take your recovery for granted. This is crucial because if you lose this, you risk losing everything. Always remember what you have come from and what you will be going back to if you drink or use drugs again in the future. If you are always grateful for being sober, it is highly unlikely you will ever relapse.
Never Stop Trying to Improve Your Life
It is often said that recovery is a process and not an event. The fact that you decide to stop drinking and using drugs is a great start, but it certainly does not mean your life is all going to be plain sailing from there on in. You have to be always working hard to improve your life. The problem is that as soon as you stop making progress, you are likely to begin backsliding. Each improvement you make to your life is taking you that little bit further away from addiction; your goal is to get as far away as you possibly can.
The goal in recovery is progress and not perfection. All humans have character flaws, but it does not mean we have to just accept them. Your job in recovery is to begin chipping away at these negative character traits, especially the ones that are likely to lead you back into addiction. This is the work of a lifetime but the more progress you make, the happier you are going to be.
