When a loved one is struggling with addiction, it is difficult to watch them descend into a life of despair. You know that they need help and will be trying everything in your power to make them get this help, but to no avail. The problem is that you cannot force them to get help if they do not want it. As well as this, an addict must want help, or any treatment will probably be ineffective. No matter how much you want them to get better, unless they want to, it is not going to happen. So what exactly is stopping your loved one from seeking help?
They Think They Don’t Need Help
It is easy to see that a problem exists when looking in from the outside. However, for the addict, there may not be a problem. Addicts are often in denial and do not think that they have any sort of problem. All they can see is that the substance they are addicted to makes them feel better. There was probably some underlying reason that caused them to turn to drugs or alcohol in the first place. They will often feel temporarily better while under the influence, which in turn will be their justification for continuing to use. However, as time goes by, the ‘good’ feelings are often replaced by more and more of the ‘bad’. This is when things can get really tough. It has often been said that addicts will have to reach their rock bottom before realising that they need help.
They are Not Ready
Family members and friends are often so desperate for their addicted loved ones to get better that they cannot understand why these individuals refuse to get help. It is often the case that an addict will refuse help simply because they are not ready to take that step. They may be still at the stage where their addiction makes them feel better and they just do not want to stop. They may become resentful of family members who they perceive as trying to ‘spoil their fun’. It is important for loved ones to understand these issues and to not give up. There will come a time when the addict realises that the addiction has taken hold and that he or she does need to get help.
They Feel It Will Make Them Appear Weak
Unbelievably, many addicts think that by asking for help it makes them appear weak. Even if they have admitted to themselves the need to quit, they may believe that they can do it themselves. One of the biggest issues with this kind of thinking is that the addict may actually think the problem is not as serious as their loved ones do, and, therefore, they do not need outside help. This is another form of denial; this is one of the reasons that lead to eventual relapse even if the addict does initially stay sober for a certain period. One thing that the loved ones of addicts can do is to make them see that asking for help does not make them weak. In fact, it takes great strength to admit there is a problem and to admit that this problem cannot be solved alone.
They Think Rehab Will Be Too Difficult
Many addicts will already have a preconception of what rehab is going to be like. This may be from what they have seen on television or in movies. There is no doubt that withdrawing from any substance is going to be tough and that entering rehab or getting treatment for addiction is a huge step. However, getting treatment for addiction can be a huge relief for the addict. They may not even realise how badly the substance abuse had been affecting them. Once they begin taking the steps toward rehabilitation, they may find that they even begin to enjoy the experience. Working with qualified therapists and counsellors can be hugely gratifying, especially when those counsellors come from the same background as three addict and are living proof that you can come out the other side intact. Rehabilitation is hard work but the experience can often be enjoyable too.
They Think They Are Destined To Fail
Many addicts assume that they are never going to get better so ‘what is the point in trying’. This is a defeatist attitude that, unfortunately, many addicts suffer with. The truth is that most addicts will relapse at some point but that does not mean they should not try to get better. A lot of addicts will relapse more than once before they make a success of sobriety. It is common to relapse but it is not a given. Everyone is different and the key to success is tackling the issue that caused the individual to become addicted in the first place.
They Think Rehab is Not the Answer
A previous relapse in a rehabilitation centre can often lead an addict to fear that he or she cannot be helped. They may be of the opinion that rehabilitation just does not work for them as it did not work in the past. However, not all rehabilitation centres use the same techniques and, what works for one person, will not necessarily work for another. Rehabilitation centres will meet with the individual and work through various issues to try to find something that is more likely to work for that person.
They Have Tried and Failed Before
If an addict has tried to quit on numerous cases before then it is natural for them to think that they cannot be helped. They will often feel as if they have let family members down and would rather carry on with their addictive behaviour than face failure again. However, with so many different treatment options available today, it is highly likely that there will be one that works for that person. Giving up is the worst thing they can do so it is necessary for loved ones to find the strength to push them into getting help, however difficult this may be.
What to Expect
Individuals who have never been to rehab before may be wondering what to expect. According to the Public Health England website, of the 193,198 people aged over 18 and receiving treatment for drug addiction in 2013/2014, 94% were in treatment for 12 weeks or more or completed their treatment before the 12 weeks were up. Ninety-eight per cent of people who received treatment were waiting for less than three weeks before their treatment began.
One thing that many addicts and family members of addicts will worry about is where to get help. Luckily, websites such as ours here as Addiction Helpline can help you find out about treatment options and rehabilitation centres. Call us today for free, independent advice on how to begin your journey to a drug or alcohol free life. We have experts ready to take your call who can advise you on the best course of action.
Source:
- http://www.nta.nhs.uk/uploads/drug-treatment-statistical-bulletin-2013-14.pdf
