If you are mentally strong then it means you will be resilient and better able to handle the challenges of life in recovery. This inner strength will also mean that you have a better chance of getting the most from this new life. Becoming mentally strong is one of the main goals of sobriety, so it is important to make an effort to develop this strength.
As you become mentally strong, it will change the way you think as well as the way you behave. Some of the signs that you have developed this quality have been listed below.
1. You Find It Easy To Accept Feedback
Those who are mentally strong respond well to feedback, even when it is critical or negative. This means that you do not take such suggestions as a personal attack and are always willing to consider that such feedback may have merit. Of course, it does not mean that you just receive criticism uncritically, but it does mean that you are more interested in improving your life than in protecting your ego.
If somebody offers you feedback, the best response is to reflect on what is being said as objectively as possible; this is a sign of mental strength. It means that you see comments as potentially valuable and are less concerned with defending yourself.
2. Making People like You Is No Longer Important
If your self-worth is dependent on whether people like you then it means you are going to be a slave to these judgements. It can make your life incredibly bumpy because one wrong word could make you feel bad about yourself. Mentally strong people have a sense of their own self-worth, meaning they are not dependent on others to tell them how great they are. The fact that you are less concerned on making others like you means you become less self-absorbed, making you more attractive as a human being; in other words, spending less time trying to make people like you can actually mean they end up liking you more.
3. You Are Honest and Open about Your Life
One thing that mentally strong people understand is that they are as sick as their secrets. Being open and honest doesn’t mean that you have to tell every person you meet about the sordid details of your life; it just means that you don’t feel the need to hide anything and are comfortable looking anyone in the eye. The most important person you need to be honest and open with is yourself because this is the only way you can begin to develop as a human so you can reach your potential.
4. You Have Plenty of Gratitude in Your Life
Happiness is not about always accumulating more and more; it is really about being grateful for all the things you currently have in your life. If you are mentally strong then you will be able to focus on all the good stuff around you, meaning that you always have something to feel happy about. This ability to always notice the good stuff is a skill you can learn and is one of the most important things one could do to increase future happiness.
5. You Rarely Become Angry
One of the most obvious signs of mental strength is the development of emotional sobriety. This means that you would be far more in control of your emotions. Consequently, you will have far more control of your life and will not have to suffer the negative consequences of anger outbursts. You may sometimes have good reason for losing your temper, but this anger will probably mean you are unable to make good decisions; it is common for people to relapse while angry. Mentally strong people do sometimes use anger in response to a situation, but it is used in a very controlled way.
6. You find it Easy to Apologise When You Are in the Wrong
The fact that you have a strong inner sense of self-worth means you longer feel shame when it comes to admitting you are wrong about something. You find it easy to say sorry because staying on track is important to you and you are willing to face the consequences of any bad decisions or bad behaviour. The fact that you find it so easy to apologise does not mean that these admissions of wrong are valueless; mentally strong people are sincere in their apologies and make changes to their life to prevent similar mistakes in the future.
7. You Are Willing to Get Outside Your Comfort Zone Regularly
Just doing the bare minimum in recovery will not allow you to enjoy the best of what this new life has to offer. The other danger is that just coasting along is also going to mean you will be at higher risk of relapse. You need to be willing to set yourself tough challenges and push yourself out of your comfort zone on a regular basis.
8. You Respond Well to Failure
One of the key factors that are going to determine your ability to get the most out of recovery is the way you react to failure. It is very easy to do the right things when everything is going well, but it is when things start to go wrong that mental strength really makes the difference. You need to stop taking failure personally and instead view it as a chance to learn and grow. It is also important to understand that failure can be part of the process of achieving anything of value in life.
9. You Are Not Co-Dependent on Others
Co-dependency refers to a situation where one person gets his or her sense of identity from being with somebody else. The individual can become so focused on dealing with the needs of this other person that it becomes the centre of their life – it is like an addiction. Mentally strong people are always willing to help friends and family but are not dependent on this helper identity.
10. You Can Easily Forgive Yourself
You are going to make mistakes, but there is no real benefit in beating yourself up too much over it. The important thing is you accept whatever bad consequences come your way as a result of this behaviour and you learn from the mistake.
11. You Understand that Mental Strength Depends on Physical Health
It is difficult to be mentally strong if you are physically unfit and eating the wrong types of food. An unhealthy lifestyle will mean lacking energy and it can make the mind feel groggy and clouded. It is not necessary to become a fitness god in order to have good physical health but you do need to engage in regular exercise. It will also be important to eat a balanced diet and avoid obesity.
12. You Spend More Time Thinking About Others
Mental strength means that you no longer need to be so focused on your own needs and desire. You feel at peace inside most of the time, which opens you up to the needs and aspirations of others. This outward focus can lead to great happiness and serenity.
